This really is the new NHL. Sean Avery, the Los Angeles Kings’ centre with the golden tongue, picked up a $1000 fine for an alleged dive in a November 3 game at Phoenix. There was no penalty called on the play, but league disciplinarian Colin Campbell reviewed the tape in his New York office and levied the fine last Monday. Avery was a little miffed.

“How can a guy sitting in an office in New York determine if you dived or not by watching a tape?” Avery told the Los Angeles Times. “They don’t know if you had a bad ankle or torn bursa sac or something. I can’t even tell you what play they are talking about. They don’t have to tell you a play, just what game they are looking at.”

Having seen the play in question I can tell you it was clearly a dive. Whether the NHL should go about policing these games after the final whistle blows is another question altogether. If guys know they’re not going to get away with garbage, even when the ref’s back is turned, then it stands to reason a lot of bad acting is going to go the way of 50 inch goal pads. The league’s divers and henchmen are going to have to start playing clean or face cash withdrawals.

Avery, of course, claims he’s being persecuted by the league. I can’t see why? Could it be the two separate incidents of race-baiting he’s been accused of in the past couple years? I don’t hate Avery. And you shouldn’t either. He’s just a guy from Pickering who’s spent his entire life playing hockey. He doesn’t know anything else. And I almost mean that literally. Talk to hardcore hockey players and you’ll find out how fixed their mindsets really are. On ice violence and stupidity is natural to them. But then they’re the same off-ice too.

Now a $1000 fine is hardly a deterrent. But the precedent is what’s important here. Unfortunately, you’re dealing with a league full of players with 10th grade educations. Some, like Avery, are hopelessly tied to the idea that racking up penalty minutes is a job. For all his “defensive” prowess, the guy is +8 in his 180 game career with 55 points and 537 pim. So you could say his job’s to fight and not let the other team score in the process.

What’s next? You know those 8-0 games that always end in huge 3rd period brawls? Well if you’re the one putting those guys on the ice to forfeit the rest of the game with fighting then you’re going to get fined. The new NHL is about playing hockey, not fighting, diving, whining, or cheap shots. The era of the blowout brawl is over. Well, it might not be over. But now it’s got a price tag.

A Short Summary of the NHL’s New Rules